Wednesday 20 July 2011

All the bad stuff...

Today I'm fed up - sooooo here goes...

Yup, in all their glory - the BAD BITS.

Losing and growing hair hurts - nasty tender scalp.
Your skin does not fit anymore - it peels or becomes tight.
You can't rely on your digestion at all, crippling constipation or raging runs.
Your favourite foods taste horrid.
There is no let up - there are no holidays from treatment.
Everything is exhausting - sitting down, standing up, all of it.
Everything is confusing. It takes enormous effort to understand what is going on (see above).
It makes me cry - I hate uncertainty. I have nothing but uncertainty.
It hurts - treatment hurts, it makes you sick and sore, in ways you never imagined.

... and yet, through all this, my friends, my family and the much and always beloved Mr G, see in grumpy, snotty, tear stained me, someone that they love, and they carry me...

Thank you xxxx

5 comments:

  1. Hi Alison,

    I have connected with you on Twitter only very recently but I am glad I did so - I think I have found my new hero! Yeah, that's you! I see that through your rough times you always find the strength to beat this and I feel so ashamed, to chicken out even on silly stuff! So that is a super bravo for you, and a big kick upside the rear end for me : ) Whenever I got scared or upset when I was little, and even now that I am 32, my dad always tells me, "Hey, you're half-Greek, be brave like Leonidas" (remember the film "300"? The king of Sparta who roared!).

    I send you big hugs and all my positive thoughts!

    Wishing you the very best,
    Vicky

    ReplyDelete
  2. sending you hugs online.... sorry it's a bad day - here's to some better days soon.... we're all here for you until they get better xxx

    ReplyDelete
  3. Don't lose that positive attitude you have (I have seen your comments on other blogs, you are full of enthusiasm), we all have bad days you will feel better soon. If you do not feel better soon do not beat yourself up, after everything you have gone through you are allowed to feel fed up, take care xx

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hope you're feeling a bit better today? Take a bit of your own advice Missus! - you're allowed to be fed up, you've been & are still going through a lot, we're in it for the long haul unfortunately but at least we've all got each other....big hugs, take care, Love Chez. xx

    ReplyDelete
  5. Thank you for all the lovely comments. Mr G has been home today as I had a CT scan today - and I'm not safe to drive due to the fuzzies, this has helped. I'm REALLY bad at doing what I tell others to do!! I'm being a bit less hard on myself and am eating white choc chip cookies which are very nice indeed.

    ReplyDelete