A jolt to the system...

Shortly after the New year, I experienced an unwanted symptom, worrying, so I got myself checked. I entered the NHS system, which for once moved at a reasonable pace. Several sets of tests (some deeply unpleasant!) later, it transpired that have an ovarian cyst. I went into work the day after. In the days after said tests my tummy grew and grew until I looked eight months pregnant. I know I am not - saw the evidence during the tests! By last Tuesday night, after an extremely uncomfortable day at work (I know, was silly to work, have been told off by healthcare professionals) I headed off to A & E.
To cut a boring story short, they discovered that my cyst is potentially nasty. I am to have a BIG operation, total hysterectomy plus.
To say that my priorities have changed overnight would be an understatement. I was stunned to realise how little I cared about being unable to work. I am absolutely devoted to my class and teaching but today I have realised I MUST come first. I do feel some anxiety about not being at work, but this is the result of years of programming to keep going regardless.
I am going to keep going, but to strengthen my body for what is to come. I'm going to 'bank' some good times for when the going gets tough and I'm going to grab every bit of positivity that comes my way.
If you have some spare good vibes - send them my way, they will have a very good home.

Changes... I have seen lots of changes in the last five years. I've been on a long journey, finding the real me. I messed up, was judged and found wanting. I moved home four times, I do hope I stay where I am now for a long time. I have changed career completely. I am now remarried, despite at one time being adamant that I would NEVER marry again. The joy I feel, almost everyday, at my new found contentment still takes my breath away. I believe I am so lucky to have a job I enjoy, (although it does sometimes infuriate me), a lovely man as my husband (I know I sometimes irritate him!)and I live in a warm and cosy house in a delightful little market town in middle England. I have much to be grateful for indeed. But I am not complacent - the last five years have shown me on several occasions that all we take for granted can be taken away in a moment. Ill health and redundancy dropped bombs into my quiet world more than once. That is why I will be content, but not smug, and I never judge anyone.

Reflections on a week in Kos - Part 1.

I am, I think, a little in love with Kos. Friendly, friendly people. A parched autumn landscape, dried aromatic herbs on the hillsides. Plane, Olive and Palm trees line the roads. Flat roofed houses topped with the ubiquitous solar water heater panels and tanks. Ochre, cream, white, olive green. Cerulean sea - all just gorgeous. At Plaka in the wild pine forests, roam wild Peafowl. Resplendent males and drabber females beg for food. The plaintive cries of a large chick resonated through the peaceful forest. We travelled on up hairpin bends,past precipices to find the tiny Basilica of Agios Ioannis (St John). The church has breathtaking views down to the sea. We found the key tucked behind a stone. The unlocked door revealed a fabulous interior with ceiling paintings, stunning icons and gold embellishments. A moment of intense spirituality swept over me. The sense of history was overcoming. There were beeswax tapers for sale - I lit one and spent some time in long unaccustomed prayer.
Later we moved on to Askelepion - a Greek/Roman site of archeological and historical significance. Another place of great serenity. Many steps led to the top of the site and truly spectacular views across the sea to Turkey. There were many butterflies and lizards basking in the sunshine. As everywhere on Kos, there were many feral cats. An especially tame one came and befriended Richard.
So much to tell, yet we had only been on Kos two days.

Roger and Val have just got in...

We watched the first episode of 'Roger and Val have just got in', starring Dawn French and Alfred Molina, this week. It is funny, but contained some aspects of life that certainly rang a bell with me. They were searching for a mislaid guarantee, without which their broken vacuum cleaner could not be repaired/replaced. Val had searched the top of the wardrobe and the small drawer to no avail, it seemed the next and last place to search was the 'big drawer'. The searching of the 'big drawer' caused a great deal of angst and incidental humour. My own filing system bears a great resemblance to that of Val and Roger. Instead of a 'big drawer' I have several smaller drawers - which can fill me with the same sense of dread when I have to search them for an errant document.
The programme, in fact, filled me with such discomfort that I actually cleared my collection of drawers. Unwanted papers were torn and shredded over the course of a day - I filled a black sack with the fruits of my efforts. I no longer have a 'big drawer' to fill me with fear. I am not a naturally organised person so the new order of my papers is a thing of wonder to behold.
I am, however, a little concerned about which fifty something foible will be tackled by Roger and Val in the next episode...

Changes

It's been a while since I last blogged. Things have not been easy. My beloved husband has been unwell, and partly as a consequence of this, lost his job. We can just about manage, but things are difficult.
However, he is enjoying volunteering at a local watermill, situated on a local Farm and Country Centre. He had always said he would love to work in a watermill and now he has the opportunity. He loves cleaning the millrace and showing all the visitors how wheat is ground and how the mill works.
I'm looking at big changes at work too. We are having a big staff change, five new members of staff, things are going to be different. I'm changing year group and looking forward to next year enormously.
We have been trying to sell our house, there is someone interested, so we hope things move ahead.
If we do sell it will be another change but another good one, we hope to move to a more rural area for our future home.
Some changes are painful, others are great. What I do know is that life with no change causes us to stagnate. We'll get over the hard times, and then we'll enjoy the good changes even more.

Paradise found...

After a hectic week during which Ofsted visited the school, we left early on Saturday for a destination unknown to me. We headed to North Norfolk and explored various little market towns before reaching our destination. The campsite was exquisite, beautifully groomed and blissfully child free. There were birds everywhere, so tame they took no notice as we passed by. We erected our new tepee easily. We could see our neighbours were astounded as so much equipment emerged from a Smart notch back Roadster (albeit one with a Bootbag!)
Soon, we headed off to Cromer. We explored the town, walked on the pier,visited the Lifeboat Museum. My inner child was satisfied by the opportunity to try on a lifeboat persons outfit!
We headed off to Sheringham for dinner, and a very quick walk by the sea, there was a stiff sea breeze. Later we watched TV and read in the comfortable site lounge, but headed for bed early. Our slumber was interrupted by a scratching noise, quietly persistent. Then we heard a gentle mewing, one of the campsite cats was trying to come and visit! We ignored it and it went away.
The dawn chorus was spectacular, so many varieties of bird were singing. It was not just the somewhat strident blackbirds as at home. The variety of song was just gorgeous.
We will be returning just as soon as we can. For a completely tranquil, away from the rat race, bolthole, our secret campsite has it all.

I only commented on Pupil Voice!

'I was interviewed by the School Council for my current post (Junior School). They were perceptive and probing and it was a challenging interview. Their views were considered, but it was only one small part of a whole day of interviews and teaching. The School Council are still involved in interviewing prospective teachers at our school and I think it is a valuable part of recruitment.'
The above post led to a very exciting holiday Saturday. I had commented on an article on the BBC news website concerning the NASUWT and Pupil Voice. I was e-mailed back very quickly and asked if I minded the BBC contacting me about my comments. You could have knocked me down with a feather, but thought no more about it. We headed out to further explore the area that we hope will be our new home. I missed a call while enjoying a latte, but returned the call immediately. It was the BBC asking me to appear live on the BBC News Channel at two o'clock. I was asked 'Could they send a car for me?' I declined, quickly realising I needed to do something about my appearance before I appeared on TV.
We rushed back home, where my lovely husband pressed a new top and pashmina for me, and I worked quick miracles on my face and hair.
When we arrived at BBC Cambridge, I was ushered into a room, more like a cupboard, and fitted with microphone and ear-piece. It was really strange talking to a circle of green LED's, and being quite fiercely challenged by a man I could not see, and whose name I did not know. Although he really pushed me to agree with his point of view, I stood firm and spoke about that in which I believe. I said that our pupils took their responsibility in interviewing staff very seriously, but did not have the ultimate say in appointments. He did say I was clearly confident and outgoing and that children would like me! He also asked ask me what I would have felt if I had not got the job, when interviewed by the school council. I assured him that I would not have blamed the children, but my own failings.
I feel justified in all I said - I know there are many who have concerns about pupil voice but at my school it works.
I only commented on Pupil Voice and ended up on the telly!